There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
When did angry sex become our thing?
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Randomize