Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
