Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Randomize