I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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