she looked like the bat from fern gully.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
A+ Viking dick
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Randomize
