Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
