everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
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