He kissed a someone with a penis
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
