Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
