Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize
