I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize