So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
