i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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