Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Randomize
