I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
A+ Viking dick
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