dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
