Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Randomize
