I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
Randomize
