would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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