That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
