You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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