Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

Pussy?

(586): View more from Michigan

how

(248): View more from Michigan

Wat do u mean how?

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...

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(225): View more from Louisiana

wtf

(1-225): View more from Louisiana

I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?

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(713): View more from Texas

I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock

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(410): View more from Maryland

Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up

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(907): View more from Alaska

marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it

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(+27): View more from South Africa

i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.

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(512): View more from Texas

dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore

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