Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Randomize