and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
