Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Randomize