I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
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