haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Why is your signature on my underwear?
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Randomize
