they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
