tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Randomize
