I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
The spoon I was using to ice my hickey just fell out of my purse while i was paying at the liquor store. I look like an alcoholic with a meth problem.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Randomize
