Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
