Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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