i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
