Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize