Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
