I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Randomize
