Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
