I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
