all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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