what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Randomize
