As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
