I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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