dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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