He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
