My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Randomize
