Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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