I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Randomize
