And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
