you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
