i just wanna soil my oats bro
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Randomize
