just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize